作者： system

家長與孩子的情感語言

system

撰文：家庭動力兒童遊戲治療師

　　　婚姻及家庭治療師　李慧芝

在我們的成長經驗中，我們都甚少被教育用語言表達自己的情緒。學校和社會均著重培育兒童的認知、分析和解難能力等，所以我們大多習慣討論事情和觀點，很少直接用說話來表達情感。即使家人之間的交流和對話，我們也不習慣分享彼此內心的感受。

有家長會問，我以行動（例如擁抱、親吻孩子）來表達對孩子的關懷，不已經足夠了嗎？父母有必要用言語肯定和回應孩子的感受及需要嗎？

父母以行動表達對孩子的愛當然重要，但父母對子女的同理回應，能夠更具體和切實地讓孩子體會到，父母是明白和接納他們的想法和感受。這不但能強化親子關係，建立孩子的安全感，子女亦能從中學習如何以語言表達情感和需要，有助減少孩子以不良行為表達內心困擾。

事實上，情感的語言的確不是我們日常習慣的語言，很多父母都擔心，假如肯定和同理回應孩子的負面情緒，可能會縱容和加劇孩子的不良行為。例如當孩子因失去心愛物件而感到傷心時，父母都會害怕重提事件，會觸及孩子傷心的感受。父母或許會對孩子說：「不要緊，玩別的便是了！」、「試試看能否買另一個代替吧。」父母都希望透過解決孩子的問題，安撫他們的情緒。

然而，這樣孩子不但無法從父母的回應中，學習如何接觸和了解自己的感受，並有效調節自己負面的情緒，更沒有機會從挫敗中汲取經驗，建立責任感。

假如父母可以設身處地，從孩子的角度了解他們的經驗，並嘗試說出他們的感受，即使簡單一句「我想，你失去了你最心愛的物件，你一定很傷心、難過。」這對於孩子而言，已經給予他們最有力的支持和安慰，使他們更有信心和勇氣地面對生活的挑戰。

School Class Teachers are More Important Than You Might Think

文章作者由system
发布日期 20/02/2025
School Class Teachers are More Important Than You Might Think无评论

system

Written by : Doctor Hui Lung Kit

Child Psychiatry’s primary concern is to determine whether a child’s behavior is normal or abnormal, and whether it is normal or abnormal should be judged according to the rules of Child Developmental Psychology. But in reality, do parents have to get a bunch of books on child development and look at the textbooks to observe their children? This is a time-consuming and costly process. One of the simpler ways is to ask your child’s class teacher.

Have you ever heard of children moving up a grade every year, like going from Grade 1 to Grade 2, Grade 3 to Grade 4? But have you ever heard of teachers moving up a grade? Generally speaking, many teachers spend months and years teaching students at the same grade level. More experienced teachers may even spend over ten years teaching children of the same age. As a result, they may have interacted with hundreds of students of the same age over time.

Developmental assessments for children place significant emphasis on comparing them with their peers of the same age. By using a large sample size of data and employing statistical methods, a reference definition of normal and abnormal can be established. An experienced teacher, with ample teaching experience, already encompasses a substantial sample size within her own teaching practice. Based on this, she can determine what is considered normal and abnormal.

For example, let’s say in September this year, a class teacher is faced with a new class of 30 students in Grade 1. When assessing each individual student, the teacher unconsciously compares the current students with the same-age students they have taught in the past. If, through this comparison, the teacher senses something “off” or “peculiar” about a student, this feeling actually holds statistical significance! However, teachers themselves may not be aware of it.

Many parents have a significant lack of trust in schools and teachers. I have also observed some common blind spots in the evaluation process of schools and teachers (such as generally having more lenient behavioral standards for academically successful students). However, it is important to remember that parents only interact with their own 1 or 2 children on a daily basis, while schools and teachers deal with hundreds of students. When determining whether a child’s emotions and behaviors are normal or abnormal, the opinions of schools and teachers undoubtedly hold valuable reference points.

未分類未分類未分類

學校班主任比你想像更重要

system

撰文：許龍杰醫生

兒童精神病學 (Child Psychiatry) 首要處理的課題，是要分辨小朋友的行為是正常還是失常，而正常與否，就應跟據兒童發展心理學 (Child Developmental Psychology) 的規律作判斷。但在現實情況下，難道家長要找來一大堆兒童發展的專書，對著教科書來觀察孩子嗎？這實在費時失事。而其中一個較為簡單的方法是：問一問孩子的學校班主任。

大家有聽過小朋友會年年升班，小一升小二、小三升小四，但有聽過老師會升班的嗎？一般而言，很多老師都會經年累月教授同一級別的學生，年資長一點的老師，更可能十多年都對著相同歲數的小朋友。如此累積下來，接觸同一歲數的學生可能數以百計。

兒童的發展評估首重同齡兒童之間的比較，把大量的數據樣本以統計學的方法，釐定正常與不正常的參考定義。一位資歷豐富的老師，她本身的教學經驗裡已包含了相當大的樣本數量 (sample size)，可以據之判斷何謂正常和不正常。

比方說，今年9月小一開學，一位班主任又要面對一班30人的新同學。在評核每一位個別同學之時，班主任都會在腦海中不自覺地把眼前的小朋友，跟以往教過的同一年齡學生作出比較。假如在比較之下，發覺學生有點「不妥」、「怪怪地」，這種感覺其實已經有統計學上的意義！只是老師們不自知。

很多家長都對學校和老師有很大的不信任。筆者也觀察到，學校和老師有一些常見的評估盲點（例如普遍對成績好的同學的行為標準較寛鬆）。但要記著，家長每天對著的，只是自己那 1、2 個子女，但學校和老師，對著的可是上百個學生。要分辨小朋友的情緒和行為是正常還是不正常，學校和老師的意見，絕對有參考價值。

Marital Conflicts: Suffering the Children

文章作者由system
发布日期 19/02/2025
Marital Conflicts: Suffering the Children无评论

system

Written by: Marriage and Family Therapist, Child Play Therapist, Lee Wai Zi

The arrival of a child often brings significant changes to a family. Many times, parents become so busy taking care of and educating their children that they inadvertently neglect the quality of their marital life. Over time, their relationship may become reduced to a series of responsibilities and pressures. I once heard a friend say that every day after work, he would mechanically check his children’s homework and supervise their studying, while his wife took care of their meals and routines. By the time they could finally rest, it was often late at night, and even if they had some energy left to talk, their conversations revolved solely around their children’s academic performance. Sometimes, they didn’t even have enough time to rest themselves, let alone care for or respond to each other’s needs.

In my counseling experience, I have encountered many couples facing difficulties in their marriage, and they all agree that their relationship began to suffer after the birth of their child. Most people would think this is due to differing expectations and educational methods regarding their children, or an unequal distribution of roles and responsibilities in parenting, leading to conflicts.

However, the vast majority of couples express that they do not necessarily need their partner to agree with their thoughts or actions. The crux of the issue lies in the fact that when they confront parenting and various life pressures, they often feel a lack of recognition, support, and acceptance from their spouse, leading both parties to feel isolated and helpless. This gradually undermines the trust and emotional connection between them.

It is perfectly normal for couples to have different educational philosophies and methods. Yet, during the parenting process, parents often resort to ineffective and destructive methods to handle their differences, unintentionally creating a negative cycle of interaction. For example, a wife might complain about their child’s disobedience in front of her husband, or express dissatisfaction that he is not helping with household chores and parenting responsibilities. The wife’s intention in expressing her frustrations is to make her husband understand her worries and concerns, and to gain his support and comfort.

However, the husband usually only perceives his wife’s complaints and criticisms. To protect himself from emotional harm, he may remain silent or repeatedly explain and defend himself, hoping for his wife’s understanding and acceptance. The more the husband explains, the more the wife feels unvalued and misunderstood, leading her to escalate her accusations. The more she accuses, the more helpless the husband feels, prompting him to avoid the situation and defend himself even more. Both partners become victims within this negative cycle of interaction. If parents do not promptly confront and resolve the deadlock in their relationship, it will not only prolong and exacerbate the issues, but it may ultimately harm their children.

The health of a family and its children is built upon a strong emotional connection between the couple. Therefore, for the sake of themselves and their children, parents should consider spending more time nurturing the love between them. A happy marriage will naturally allow children to grow up healthy and joyful.

夫妻衝突苦了孩子

system

撰文：婚姻及家庭治療師

　　　兒童遊戲治療師　李慧芝

每當有孩子出世，都會為家庭帶來轉變。很多時候，父母因忙於照顧及管教子女，都會容易忽略自己婚姻生活的質素，久而久之，夫妻生活變得只剩下一堆責任和壓力。筆者曾經聽過一位朋友說，他每天下班回家，都是流水作業式地替子女檢查功課，督導孩子溫習，太太則照顧他們的飲食和作息，到了夫婦倆可以休息的時候，往往已是夜深，即使還有餘力和太太談上幾句，說的都只是子女的學業成績和表現。有時甚至連自己休息的時間尚且不夠，更莫說要關心和回應配偶的需要。

在筆者的輔導經驗中，曾經遇過很多婚姻關係出現困難的夫婦，他們都不約而同地認為他們關係出現問題，是由子女出世後開始。一般人會認為，這是因為父母對子女的期望和教育方法不同，又或在培育子女的角色和責任上分配不均，而導致關係的衝突。

然而，絕大多數的夫婦卻表示，他們不一定要對方認同自己的想法或做法，問題的關鍵在於當他們面對育兒及各種生活壓力時，往往因為感受不到配偶的重視、支持和接納，以致雙方都陷入孤單和無助的境況，漸漸地破壞彼此間的信任和情感連結。

夫妻間有不同的教育理念和方法，本是很平常和自然的事。但在育兒的過程中，父母容易重複以無效和具破壞性的方法，處理彼此的分歧，令關係不知不覺地形成負向互動循環。例如妻子會在丈夫面前抱怨孩子不聽話，甚至埋怨丈夫沒有幫忙分擔家事和育兒的責任，太太表達不滿的目的是希望丈夫明白自己的憂慮和困擾，並得到丈夫的支持和安慰。

然而，丈夫往往只能接收到太太的批評和指責，而為了保護自己免受傷害，他們或許會默不作聲，或是多番解釋和替自己辯護，期望得到太太的體諒和接納。丈夫愈解釋，太太就愈感到不被重視和明白，因而愈加指責。而太太愈指責，又會令丈夫愈感到無助，並愈加逃避和防衛。夫婦倆既是這負向互動循環中的一員，又是互動循環下的受害者。假如父母沒有及時正視和處理關係的僵局，不但會令問題持續和惡化，最終也可能會苦了孩子。

家庭和孩子的健康，建基於夫婦倆穩固的情感連結。因此，為了自己和孩子，不妨花多點時間孕育與伴侶間的愛情。只要父母婚姻美滿，孩子自然能健康快樂地成長。

News

Notice on Our Kindergarten’s Fun Channel Videos

文章作者由system
发布日期 04/02/2025
Notice on Our Kindergarten’s Fun Channel Videos无评论

Dear Parents/Guardians,

Learning goes beyond just sitting in a classroom; it can also be active! Tung Wah Group of Hospitals Kindergarten has a climbing wall that encourages children to participate in physical activities, helping them develop their large muscles and improve their coordination.

Engaging in sports can also inspire children’s development! At our kindergarten, children regularly take part in various physical activities, which not only promote a healthy lifestyle but also foster a love for sports, possibly leading to future athletic achievements.

Check Out the New Videos on Our Fun Channel:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1Lx9FyM4eZ/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DFmjrqDTXba/?igsh=MWh2ZmZ5aW1zMmJ6dQ==

Yours faithfully,

TWGHs Tsui Tsin Tong Kindergarten

有關本院奇趣頻道影片事宜

各位家長：

學習不只是坐在課室裡，還可以動起來！東華三院幼稚園設有攀石牆，鼓勵小朋友運動之餘，透過攀爬訓練大肌肉發展，增強身體協調能力。

運動更能成為孩子成長的啟發！小朋友在東華三院幼稚園常常接觸不同的體能活動，不僅幫助建立健康體魄，還可點燃他們對體育的熱愛，甚至成為未來的運動小健將。

奇趣頻道新影片

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/1Lx9FyM4eZ/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DFmjrqDTXba/?igsh=MWh2ZmZ5aW1zMmJ6dQ==

東華三院徐展堂幼稚園謹啟

未分類未分類

Training Young Minds: Brain Training Games

文章作者由system
发布日期 18/01/2025
Training Young Minds: Brain Training Games无评论

system

Written by: Ms. Carmen Leung, part-time lecturer for Bachelor of Education in OUHK

DHA is merely a nutrient that supports brain development in children, but to make children smarter, their brains need proper exercise. Here are some brain-training games that are perfect for children aged 2 to those in primary school!

1. Maze and Spot-the-Difference Activities
Although mazes and spot-the-difference games were popular when we were young, they remain valuable tools for children today. These brain-training activities come in various forms; any image-based game that requires children to observe and concentrate to complete tasks qualifies as a brain exercise. For instance, are you familiar with “Where’s Wally?”—one of the most popular brain games worldwide?

In fact, brain games don’t necessarily need to be purchased or printed in books; you can easily create them at home. For example, parents can hide two candies among a pile of clutter, and children will surely focus intently to find them!

2. Organizing and Categorizing Household Items
Everyday life offers excellent opportunities for brain training, such as tidying up and sorting. Organizing items systematically not only enhances children’s organizational skills but also encourages their creativity. Sometimes, children may classify items differently than adults, but their methods can be quite logical. Parents might ask children why they categorize items in a certain way, discovering that children’s observational skills can be sharper than expected. They often use details they observe for classification, so parents should avoid imposing adult categorization methods to prevent stifling their problem-solving initiative.

You might wonder what to do if your child dislikes tidying up. Before children develop the habit of organizing and sorting household items, it’s essential to start with games to boost their motivation to complete “missions.” For instance, you could hold a “Room Organization Contest” or “Clean-Up Day,” encouraging family members to help each other tidy up, which also serves as a fun way to exercise their brains!

3. Memory Games
There are many memory card games available, such as flipping over a set of cards and taking turns to reveal two at a time. If the cards match, players keep them. Additionally, there are cards with different pictures on them that parents can lay out for children to see, then flip them over and ask children to identify where a specific item is located. These are excellent memory games, and both adults and children can add creativity by changing the rules to make them more interesting.

Beyond card games, everyday life is full of opportunities for memory games. For example, you can ask children to find items they’ve seen you place somewhere, or have them put away some objects and later ask them to retrieve them after a certain period.

In summary, training children’s brains and intelligence is not difficult at all. With a bit of thought and creativity, many everyday details can provide opportunities for children to think critically!

鍛練小腦袋「腦力」訓練小遊戲

system

撰文：公開大學幼兒教育學士課程兼職講師梁嘉敏

DHA 只是供應孩子腦部發展的養分，要孩子變得聰明，大腦必須得到適當的鍛鍊。今次就為大家介紹一些腦袋鍛鍊小遊戲，十分適合2歲至就讀小學的兒童呢！

1. 迷宮或找不同等腦圖練習
雖然迷宮和找不同等腦圖練習是我們小時候的玩意，但到了這個年代，它們依然是孩子的良師益友。腦圖練習除了迷宮、找不同外，還有很多不同的模式，總之凡是需要孩子觀察和專注地完成任務的圖像遊戲，均屬於腦圖練習。不知道大家是否認識Wally（中譯《威利在哪裡？》），它就是世上其中最受歡迎的腦圖遊戲。

其實腦圖遊戲不一定需要購買，也不一定印在書本上，我們在家中也可輕易製作腦圖遊戲。例如家長可以在一堆雜物中放兩顆瑞士糖，那孩子一定會很用心地找出來呢！

2. 收拾家中物件　並把物件分類
其實日常生活上不同的環節，也是鍛鍊腦筋的大好機會，例如收拾和分類。把物件有條理地分類，不單能提升孩子的組織能力，更能發揮孩子的創意。有時孩子的分類方法可能跟我們成年人不同，不過也不無他們的道理，家長不妨問一下孩子為甚麼會這樣分類，你便會發現原來孩子的觀察力可能比你更強，他們會用他們觀察到的細節作分類，所以家長不應要孩子根據成年人眼中的分類方法，以免打擊他們自我解難的主動性。

你可能會問，我家孩子不喜歡收拾物件，那該怎麼辦呢？在孩子還未養成收拾家中物品和分類的習慣時，一定要從遊戲開始，以提升孩子花氣力去完成「使命」的動機。例如可以舉辦「房間鬥整齊比賽」或「阿四日」，讓家庭成員互相幫大家執房等活動，以鼓勵孩子收拾和分類，也可以鍛鍊一下「腦力」!

3. 考記憶遊戲
坊間有很多記憶遊戲卡，例如把十數張牌反轉，輪流翻開兩張，如果翻開了相同的卡牌，便可以拿到自己手上。另外，坊間亦有些繪有不同物件的圖卡，家長可將它們打開排成一行，讓孩子看了然後反轉，再問孩子某一件物件在哪一張卡上。這些均是很好的記憶力遊戲，成年人或孩子更可以發揮更多創意，變換一下玩法以增加趣味性。

除了記憶遊戲卡之外，在日常生活中也蘊含著豐富的記憶遊戲，例如我們可以叫孩子找出一些他們曾經見過你放在哪裡的物件，或者可以叫孩子自己收起一些物件，然後在一段長時間後找出來等等。

總結而言，要訓練孩子的腦力和智力其實一點也不難，只要花一點心思，發揮一下創意，很多生活中的細節也是讓孩子動腦筋的機會！

有關「聖誕樹親子環保設計比賽」結果公布事宜

感謝家長與子女參加聖誕樹親子環保設計比賽，所有呈交作品具創意及美感。經過全校家長及幼兒網上投票喜歡作品後。現將結果公布如下，敬請家長留意。

「家長眼中」的作品

冠軍 – 下K1A 劉逸童

亞軍 – 上K2B 曾楚欣

季軍 – 上K2A 楊慕嘉

優異獎 – 上K2A 夏健朗

優異獎 – 上K2A 劉雋謙

優異獎 – 上K3A 張哲睿

「幼兒眼中」的作品

冠軍- 上K2B 楊濤銘

亞軍 – 下K3A 陳貝萓

季軍 – 上K2B 陳諾衡

優異獎- 上K1B 姜芊羽

優異獎 – 上K3A 霍瀅善

優異獎- 上K3B 李鈞軒

恭喜以上各得獎者。

　　本校十分欣賞各位幼兒和家長用心設計創作，凡參加比賽者均獲頒「積極參與獎」，以茲讚賞。本校已於eClass Parent App「數碼頻道」的相簿內與大家分享美麗的得獎作品。

東華三院徐展堂幼稚園謹啟