Training Young Minds: Brain Training Games

Parents Zone

 

Written by: Ms. Carmen Leung, part-time lecturer for Bachelor of Education in OUHK

 

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DHA is merely a nutrient that supports brain development in children, but to make children smarter, their brains need proper exercise. Here are some brain-training games that are perfect for children aged 2 to those in primary school!

1. Maze and Spot-the-Difference Activities
Although mazes and spot-the-difference games were popular when we were young, they remain valuable tools for children today. These brain-training activities come in various forms; any image-based game that requires children to observe and concentrate to complete tasks qualifies as a brain exercise. For instance, are you familiar with “Where’s Wally?”—one of the most popular brain games worldwide?

 

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In fact, brain games don’t necessarily need to be purchased or printed in books; you can easily create them at home. For example, parents can hide two candies among a pile of clutter, and children will surely focus intently to find them!

2. Organizing and Categorizing Household Items
Everyday life offers excellent opportunities for brain training, such as tidying up and sorting. Organizing items systematically not only enhances children’s organizational skills but also encourages their creativity. Sometimes, children may classify items differently than adults, but their methods can be quite logical. Parents might ask children why they categorize items in a certain way, discovering that children’s observational skills can be sharper than expected. They often use details they observe for classification, so parents should avoid imposing adult categorization methods to prevent stifling their problem-solving initiative.

 

You might wonder what to do if your child dislikes tidying up. Before children develop the habit of organizing and sorting household items, it’s essential to start with games to boost their motivation to complete “missions.” For instance, you could hold a “Room Organization Contest” or “Clean-Up Day,” encouraging family members to help each other tidy up, which also serves as a fun way to exercise their brains!

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3. Memory Games
There are many memory card games available, such as flipping over a set of cards and taking turns to reveal two at a time. If the cards match, players keep them. Additionally, there are cards with different pictures on them that parents can lay out for children to see, then flip them over and ask children to identify where a specific item is located. These are excellent memory games, and both adults and children can add creativity by changing the rules to make them more interesting. 

Beyond card games, everyday life is full of opportunities for memory games. For example, you can ask children to find items they’ve seen you place somewhere, or have them put away some objects and later ask them to retrieve them after a certain period.

 

In summary, training children’s brains and intelligence is not difficult at all. With a bit of thought and creativity, many everyday details can provide opportunities for children to think critically!

Why Are Children Afraid to Communicate with Their Parents?

Parents Zone

 

Written by: Dr. Tik Chi-yuen, Director of Hong Kong Institute of Family Education

 

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Last weekend, I attended a parent seminar where it was mentioned that parents should establish a close communication relationship with their children. Nowadays, young people rarely confide in their parents when facing difficulties. During the open discussion, a father asked me, “My son is in Form 3, and we rarely talk, especially about his feelings. How can I build a communication relationship with him?” I believe many parents have faced similar issues, especially as their children grow. Why is it so difficult to establish heartfelt communication with our children?

 

When children are young, communication seems to be straightforward and without issues. However, as they grow into adolescence, parents often find communication suddenly becomes challenging. Some parents say that communication has become “one sentence against nine,” meaning when parents say one thing, children respond with nine counterarguments, making effective communication difficult. What is the problem? It lies in the topics and attitudes we adopt when communicating with our children.

 

When we come home each day, the first question we often ask our children is, “Have you finished your homework?” We constantly remind them to take a shower, tidy up their toys, do their homework, and review their lessons. This creates a daily routine filled with tasks. When the parent-child relationship becomes task-oriented, both sides feel exhausted. Some parents feel drained by having to manage their children’s responsibilities every day, and children feel overwhelmed as well. When our conversations revolve around tasks and chores, children gradually perceive talking to parents as a source of pressure, leading them to be less willing to communicate.

 

 

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Regarding attitude, parents need to reflect and reassess their approach. We often have too many criticisms and reprimands about our children’s performance. When their handwriting is messy, we correct it and ask them to rewrite it; when they barely pass a test, we express our dissatisfaction. We frequently compare our children with others, diminishing their achievements. This overly critical and comparative attitude makes children feel that their parents are never satisfied, which is difficult for them to handle and also undermines their self-confidence. Just as we dislike harsh bosses, children also feel distanced from parents who constantly criticize them, leading them to avoid sharing their thoughts and feelings.

 

 

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With these issues at hand, how can we improve? If our children are still young, we should immediately work on improving the content and attitude of our communication. We should discuss topics of mutual interest, especially happy experiences. Additionally, we should appreciate our children’s strengths and offer more encouragement and support. If our children are already in their teenage years, we need to learn to be friends with them, listen more, and nag less. We should first open up to them about our feelings to encourage them to share their thoughts with us as well. The bond between parents and children is inherently one of affection; we can build an intimate communication relationship by putting in the effort.

 

 

Instead of Overprotecting, It’s Better to Accompany Them Through Ups and Downs.

Parents Zone

 

Written by: Child Play Therapist, Marriage and Family Therapist, Ms. Lee Wai Zi

 

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Recently, I saw a friend share a short video on Facebook, featuring her 5-year-old son demonstrating how to cut broccoli with a serrated knife. The edited video lasted about three and a half minutes and was filmed entirely by the mother. In the video, the boy’s cutting skills were not exactly proficient, but he wore a calm expression and explained his actions confidently.

 

As a therapist, I completely agree with the mother’s approach of allowing her child to learn and gain experience from life. After all, the harm from a serrated knife is limited; even if he does cut himself, it would likely only result in a minor injury, and children tend to recover quickly. However, as a mother myself, I couldn’t help but feel worried while watching the entire process.

 

 

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When the boy successfully cut through the broccoli, I let out a sigh of relief. I greatly admired his patience and effort, but I was even more impressed by the mother’s courage.

 

Many parents often struggle between allowing their children to try new things and worrying about them facing setbacks. While many parents rationally understand that children need some autonomy to develop a sense of responsibility and confidence, the instinct to protect their children from failure or pain is powerful. These worries and anxieties lead parents to protect their children from making mistakes in various ways, such as making decisions for them, completing responsibilities they should handle themselves, or persuading them to solve problems in the parents’ way.

Parents’ concerns about their children’s potential failures come from a place of love, which is natural. However, the greatest gift parents can give their children is not to protect them from making mistakes or getting hurt, but to accompany them through the highs and lows, as well as the successes and failures. This kind of companionship includes respect, trust, and support for the child—respecting their right to make their own choices, trusting that they can handle the consequences of those choices, and providing unwavering support when they face difficulties and setbacks.

 

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No one can guarantee that a child’s life will be smooth sailing, but a parent’s presence can assure their child that they are never alone. Only then can children confidently explore, learn, and develop their strengths.

 

 

 

Oral Muscle Development Training: Laying the Foundation for Language Skills

Parents Zone

 

Written by: Speech Therapist Ms Jenny T. Y. Kwok

 

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Every child’s language ability is different. Some children can speak various words by the age of one and form sentences by two, communicating effectively with others. However, some children develop their language skills more slowly. In fact, the development of oral muscles has a profound impact on both eating and language abilities. Parents can engage in various small games to train their children’s oral muscles, laying a solid foundation for their language development.

 

Oral muscles include the muscles of the cheeks, lips, tongue, and jaw, which develop and improve with age and eating experiences. The strength, control, flexibility, and coordination of these muscles are crucial factors in a child’s ability to learn to speak.

 

Daily meal times provide excellent practice opportunities. However, some cases involve children primarily eating finely chopped or pureed foods, which can hinder the normal development of their chewing abilities, affecting both eating and language development. Common issues include drooling and unclear or inaccurate pronunciation, so oral muscle problems must be addressed.

 

Here are some simple games to train oral muscles, which we hope will improve children’s oral capabilities through fun activities, thus laying a strong foundation for their language skills.

 

Blowing Practice

 

How to Play:

 

First, prepare a basin of water and position it between the parent and child, who should face each other. Fill the basin halfway with water and place a paper boat on the parent’s side, adding a small treat or toy (such as stickers, etc.) inside. The parent blows the paper boat toward the child, who can then take the treat. If the child wants more, they must blow the boat back toward the parent.

 

This blowing exercise strengthens the ability to retract the tongue and round the lips, enhancing the stability and control of the jaw, which improves speech clarity.

 

 

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Chewing Practice
 

How to Play:

Cut harder vegetables or fruits (such as carrots, cucumbers, celery, and apples) into strips approximately the length and thickness of a finger. The parent holds the end of the vegetable strip and places it between the child’s molars to encourage chewing. The parent should stabilize the food’s position, pushing it slightly each time the child bites until the strip is completely eaten, alternating sides for practice. Parents can adjust the size, length, and hardness of the food strips according to the child’s abilities.

Chewing requires the coordination of the lips, tongue, and jaw muscles, while speech development also relies on the collaboration of different oral muscles to produce various sounds. Therefore, chewing training helps improve clarity of pronunciation.

 
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Are You Fearful of Answering Calls from School?

Parents Zone
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Written by: Heep Hong Society Educational Psychologist Team

 

During a parents’ meeting, Mrs. Wong expressed her fear of receiving calls addressed to her as “Mrs. Wong,” as they are usually from her son Didi’s class teacher. Each time, the call revolves around complaints about Didi’s unusual behavior in class—either he frequently leaves his seat or disrupts his classmates during lessons. On rare occasions when he stays in his seat, she hopes for some quiet, but within 15 minutes, he becomes active again, and his disruptive behavior resumes. The most frustrating issue for the teacher is Didi’s noticeable lack of focus compared to his peers. He cannot concentrate for long during lessons; even the sound of a classmate coughing or whispering is enough to distract him, especially in dull classes where his attention drops rapidly.

 

Didi is also an impulsive child. There was an incident when a classmate sitting next to him accidentally kicked him, and he immediately retaliated with his fists. He often speaks without thinking, which frequently embarrasses those around him. Over time, not only do many teachers dislike him, but his classmates also find him very annoying. As a result, during recess, Didi often finds himself alone. Each day he comes home and complains to his mother about how unhappy he is because no one wants to play with him, and each time she hears this, her heart aches. She patiently talks to Didi, hoping he will realize his mistakes and change, but the calls from school continue without interruption.

 

 

 

 

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Compared to other children his age, Didi has a shorter attention span, is unusually hyperactive, and exhibits many behavioral problems. Due to his impulsivity, he may be a child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Parents who notice similar signs in their children should seek evaluation and assistance as soon as possible. The earlier children receive help, the more their difficulties in learning and socializing can be alleviated.

 

 

Improving Children’s “Slow” Attitude Toward Tasks

Parents Zone
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Provided by: Unleashing Mind Professional Counselling Academy Psychotherapist Lee Wai-Tong

 

Often, impatient parents find themselves with children who move at a “slow” pace. For example, a little girl might be lying in bed when her mother calls her: “Get up, change your clothes…” But she continues to lie there. The anxious mother, unable to bear the ticking clock, might exclaim, “It’s too late!” and proceed to pull out clothes and accessories. Even if the girl stays lying down, her mother may lift her up to change her clothes and brush her teeth. In this process, the girl learns that by remaining unresponsive, her mother will ultimately do everything for her. This becomes a “reward” in her eyes, leading to a vicious cycle.

 

Thus, we often think it’s time for the child to speed up and learn to do things independently, rather than having the mother constantly urging her on or even helping her. At this moment, both sides face significant challenges. First, the mother must learn to control her anger. After all, this isn’t just a one-time issue; past experiences can leave a deep imprint on her. So, when she anticipates the next morning’s struggle to wake her daughter, she may already feel frustrated and impatient. With such feelings, it becomes difficult for her to give her daughter the space to dress herself. The first thing the mother needs to learn is self-regulation. What does that mean? It starts with telling herself, “Let’s start over.”

 

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Secondly, the girl has learned that lying in bed without moving for a while will lead her mother to help her. Thus, for the daughter to find it easier to act, the mother must control her anger and allow her space to get dressed. Additionally, parents can offer rewards; for instance, they could designate the upcoming week as “Get Up by Yourself Week.” If the daughter can wake up and brush her teeth within 20 minutes, she could earn a reward, such as candy or an extra five minutes of playtime with her toys. This way, the daughter feels more motivated, and with her mother giving her space, she will gradually learn to do it herself.

 

After all the children finish their cake, they begin to play together. When Huen sees Cheng has a new toy car, he asks to borrow it, and Cheng agrees. Later, when Cheng sees Huen with a very special toy car and asks to borrow it, Huen flatly refuses. The mother tries to gently persuade Huen, but unexpectedly, he throws a tantrum, accusing her of only supporting Cheng, and tosses aside the car he had borrowed from Cheng, leading to an awkward situation. The author then asks at what age Huen began to display this behavior. His mother replies, “Actually, he started behaving like this at five years old. I thought it would improve as he grew older, but it has only gotten worse.”

 

 

Dealing with Children’s Emotions After a Pet’s Passing: Understanding Grief Therapy

Parents Zone
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Pets, whether cats, dogs, or hamsters, are an integral part of the family and serve as wonderful companions for children as they grow up. However, pets will eventually leave us. While adults may find it easier to cope, for children, this may be their first significant encounter with the loss of a loved one.

According to a study conducted by Massachusetts General Hospital, which tracked over 6,000 children who experienced the loss of a pet, there is a correlation between the death of a pet or sudden separation and the subsequent onset of depression in children. Some cases showed that children continued to mourn their pets even three years after their death, ultimately being diagnosed with depression. This highlights that “how to cope with the loss of a pet” is an issue that needs to be taken seriously.

Registered psychologist Ching Wai-keung states that having a pet is a great opportunity for children to develop empathy, compassion, and a sense of responsibility. Generally, parents can consider allowing children aged 2-3 to start caring for a pet. However, while enjoying the joyful moments with pets, parents should also prepare their children for the grief associated with loss.

 

 

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Ching Wai-keung notes that when children face the loss of a pet, they may exhibit emotional outbursts. In addition to crying and being upset, they may also show regressive behavior or feel guilt and self-blame. Parents should encourage children to express their emotions to prevent them from internalizing negative feelings, which could lead to further invisible trauma. To help ease children’s emotions, parents can try the following methods:

  1. Be Honest

Parents should honestly explain to their children why the pet has passed away, rather than trying to deceive them with lies. Phrases like “The puppy ran away” or “The cat will come back later” can create more confusion for the child. It is the parents’ responsibility to teach their children to recognize their emotions rather than divert their attention.

  1. Show Understanding

Comments like “It’s just a dog; why get so upset?” or “Just get another one” may lead children to undervalue their emotions, thinking they can simply replace their pet with money. Instead, parents should express understanding of the child’s sadness, sharing that they feel the same way. This encourages children to articulate their feelings and release negative emotions. Additionally, providing more hugs can help give children a sense of security.

  1. Accompany Them in Farewell

Parents should participate with their children in a “pet farewell ceremony.” This could involve creating a memorial, organizing pet photos, or sorting through daily items, giving children the opportunity to say “goodbye” to their pet rather than ignoring the loss.

 
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Master These 3 Tips to Help Your Children Follow Instructions!

Parents Zone
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“Why don’t you listen?” “Look at how well-behaved that child is.” Have you ever found these phrases familiar? The issue of children not listening is a common problem that many parents struggle to resolve. Some parents resort to scolding, which can worsen the parent-child relationship, while others choose to ignore the behavior, fearing their children will become worse as they grow up.

If you want your children to grow up healthy and happy while also being able to follow instructions, it’s actually not difficult—the key lies in the hands of the parents.

  1. Avoid Bombarding with Demands

Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine that when you arrive at work, your boss immediately throws ten tasks at you. You would likely feel frustrated, unsure of where to start, and overwhelmed by the sheer volume of work. The same goes for children; receiving too many instructions at once can leave them feeling confused, and they may not have the ability to prioritize those tasks, leading them to simply “pretend not to hear.” Parents should wait for their children to complete one task before giving them another, rather than listing all demands at once.

  1. Avoid Using Interrogative Phrasing

 

Some parents like to give instructions in the form of questions, such as “How about you clean up after eating?” For children, this is not an instruction but rather a question that they can choose to ignore. If parents want their children to clean up after meals, they should say directly, “You need to clean up after eating.”

 

 

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  1. Choose a Time When Everyone is Focused

When to give instructions is also an important aspect. Sometimes, when children are watching TV or using their phones, they may not hear your instructions at all; they might just respond with a reflexive “Oh” or “Okay,” and then forget completely. Parents can wait until after the children have finished watching TV, or directly ask them for a minute of their attention to ensure that they understand the request. Additionally, when making requests, parents should also put aside other tasks to model focused communication for their children.

 

 

Writing Skills Mini Training

Parents Zone
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Article by Mr. Cheng Wai-keung, Psychological Counselor at the Infant and Toddler Psychological Development Association.

 

During the writing training session, Mr. Cheng Wai-keung, a psychological counselor from the Infant and Toddler Psychological Development Association, mentioned the common struggles children face when learning to write in K2.

 

“He can never write within the lines, everything ends up ‘flying’!”

“His letters always go beyond the boxes; usually, one letter ‘bullies’ two boxes!”

“He often skips lines or boxes while writing.”

“It seems like he lacks strength when writing, the writing is so light that it’s almost invisible!”

 

These are typical scenarios many children encounter when learning to write in K2. Writing requires a combination of various skills, with the most basic being the strength and flexibility of the small finger muscles (fine motor skills). Insufficient training in fine motor skills can lead to issues like weak or shaky handwriting. So, how can parents handle and train their children in this aspect? It’s simple—start by letting them play with clay, playdough, flour, and other similar materials from a young age.

 

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Furthermore, visual spatial awareness and eye control are also crucial for handwriting. Engaging in general ball activities is excellent for training these skills. Tracking the ball visually and making contact (or kicking) the ball is a natural and fun way to practice. Additionally, activities like spot the difference games (finding variances in two pictures) and maze games (first visually finding the way out, then connecting the lines with a pen) can also enhance eye control abilities.

 

Hand-eye coordination is vital during handwriting practice and should not be overlooked! Activities like bean bag tossing, fishing games, pouring water exercises, and paper cutting can greatly improve hand-eye coordination.

 

When should these games be introduced, and how long should they be practiced daily? Ideally, parents can start playing these games with their children when they understand and are capable of playing. It’s crucial to base the duration of play on the child’s willingness. If a child loses interest, parents should switch activities rather than enforcing a specific time frame. The author believes that through daily play, children can naturally acquire skills, preventing issues from arising, rather than resorting to remedial exercises. Otherwise, even the most enjoyable games can become tedious and burdensome, leading to more suffering than enjoyment.

 

Letting family travel become the best financial education lesson for children

Parents Zone
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Flora Chen

 

Co-founder of Family Wealth Education with Pigs

Certified Children’s Wealth Mentor

The meaning of “travel” varies for each individual. A wonderful trip can provide an escape from the hustle and bustle, offering relaxation for the mind and space for contemplation.

 

Recently, my newly promoted elementary school daughter noticed many of her classmates embarking on family trips during the school holidays. Being a devoted fan of “Harry Potter,” she enthusiastically suggested a family trip to Osaka, Japan during the Christmas break, as she was eager to visit the “Harry Potter” themed park there.

 

Many parents have the rich experience of being the mastermind behind planning the itinerary and budget. Naturally, the children become the “travel companions,” enjoying everything arranged by the “mom and dad tour guides.”

 

Life is a series of choices, and so is financial management. As a mother, I seized the opportunity to have a conversation with my daughter, helping her understand that travel is a “want” rather than a “need,” and a great opportunity to learn gratitude. Parents show their love by wanting their children to have enriching life experiences, willingly investing out of love rather than obligation.

But how do we combine “financial education” with “travel”? During our conversation, my daughter took the initiative to assist in planning the essential aspects of our family trip, treating it as her first “Big Project”:

 

☘️ Travel budget

☘️ Destination

☘️ Foreign exchange rates

☘️ Searching and comparing flight prices

☘️ Hotel prices and comparisons

☘️ Theme park ticket discounts

 

☘️ Transportation arrangements

 
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During the process, my daughter discovered that departing during peak travel seasons meant flight prices were 40% higher than usual! The difference in prices between fast passes and regular tickets at the theme park was significant, and her recent learning of percentages in school was put to good use in this travel planning. I also took the opportunity to discuss with her the concept of Japanese yen exchange rates and currency appreciation and depreciation.

 

Gratefully, she realized the benefits of “delayed consumption and delayed enjoyment,” suggesting we don’t rush the Christmas trip, as waiting might lead to lower ticket prices and savings. This year, my daughter, now in elementary school, has also started helping with monthly accounting for our family’s daily expenses. As a member of the family, she volunteered to set aside a portion of her savings with interest to purchase tickets to the theme park. I believe many parents are delighted to see their children embody the true essence of financial education as they grow. I look forward to my daughter sharing her first complete “Big Project – Chen Family Travel Plan and Budget.”

 

Family trips bring joy and anticipation to both parents and children alike. When children participate in the overall itinerary planning guided by their parents, incorporating financial concepts into their lives, unexpected rewards await.